Tiggy Poes and Flutterbys: Absent Fathers And The CSA

It’s been a while since I’ve written a personal post – it seems like the past month has consisted of product reviews and other people’s stories… When you’re under a lot of stress, it’s sometimes difficult to put your own thoughts into words -…

Sourced through Scoop.it from: tiggypoesandflutterbys.blogspot.co.uk

Before anyone misunderstands the purpose of my rant – it’s not about the money. Given his unreliability, I have always planned my finances without expecting any contribution from my ex. It’s just that I’m now more concerned about how his absence is affecting my daughter. Despite calling Paul ‘dad’, she is at an age where she understands relationships much more and regularly asks me why her ‘real dad’ doesn’t see her. I have never restricted his access, even when adoption was a consideration, but he has failed to make any effort for almost 10 years!
Despite trying to explain that Paul is a better dad than she could ever hope for, I often feel like my words are of little comfort – I know she still feels like something is missing. While I know she has very little respect for the guy, it’s clear that she still feels a sense of curiosity about him. I’ve asked her if she wants me to contact him, but her only response is ‘I don’t know’.
So I suppose my question is – what do I do next? I don’t want her to see him and be disappointed, but what would hurt her the least? Do I try to contact him, or should I hope that he will eventually make an effort of his own accord (perhaps he might even see this post)?
I’m sure I’m not the only one to encounter this problem and I would love to hear of any advice you guys could offer!

See on Scoop.itParental Responsibility


About towardchange

Your ‘Family Rights’ believing in the best interest of children. The issues which are important to me are, children and their families, the injustices to parents, which may occur, because of inadequate information, mistakes or corruption. This is happening every day. every minute and every second. For years I have campaigned for the rights of children and their voices to be heard.
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